5 times the kids, 5 times the...
Earlier, when I was still only thinking about writing a blog, I wanted to name it ‘Running from the Family’. There were several problems with this title. First of all, I did not want to sound like one of those wine-drinking mothers, eating cookies in the cupboard and resorting to alcohol at the end of the day to cope. Even though there is nothing wrong with that, there is too much of it around already. Success might be more likely, but I would be playing into a current trend which is just not me. A second issue with that title was that there would be limitations with regards to what I can write. Running Thoughts gives me almost complete freedom, whereas here I would have to write about my 5 kids and all the accompanying hardships all the time.
Moaning mothers are hot
In my last post did moan a bit about the physical problems us women have with our bodies after pregnancy. Looking at its overwhelming success, I realised that my audience actually likes a moaner, and a moaning mother in particular. As I am a mother of 5, I have plenty to moan about. I regularly think about how lucky I am to have 5 lovely and healthy children. This situation has become normal to me and it is my life. It has been hard going at times, especially when they were all so young, but I really love our family unit. As I dug a bit deeper into the subject, I concluded that what is normal to me, might be absurd to others. The best way to explain this is by showing you the devastation 5 kids leave behind in several areas of my life.
1. 5 times the wear
So, before I had kids, I did not realise the level of destruction they are capable of. For instance, if you are into second-hand toys or giving toys your kids have grown out of to others, then that toy is in a pretty good state and ready for a happy new owner. I can tell you now that no toys from this house are in any fit state to be passed on. At first, I was wondering if it is because our kids are little demolishers who just do not care about the value of things or who have a weird tendency to break stuff. Now I realise that our toys pass through 5 pairs of hands before they can find a new owner. No wonder nothing survives this family. Toys are only one example; everything they share (the poor plates, clothes, books, etc.) gets exposed to 5 little monsters.
2. 5 times the wash
Imagine the washing basket of a family of 7 after the washing machine has been out of order for a week. Take this thought and double the amount you see in front of you. The amount of wash we have to do is enormous. The kids spill food on their jumpers, they run around outside and not to mention the buckets of poo and pee that end up in underpants, beds and trousers. Every week a minimum of 49 underpants and 98 socks end up on the washing pile. Add at least 21 pairs of trousers, jumpers and t-shirts and you get the horrifying extent of it. Sorting it, washing it, folding it, putting it in the drawers; you could hire a help just for that and they would earn a decent salary.
3. 5 times the noise
Luckily the twins started speaking relatively late. For three years we only had 2 actively talking kids and the other 3 were still pretty quiet. Now they all talk and the noise that creates can be incredible. First of all, they all shout ‘MUM’ at the same time and then they all say their thing at the same time. I end up hearing nothing. They also fight and with 5 kids the chances of a fight are high. If they are all relatively calm and under control, the noise is also fine, but when they get excited, angry, happy or anything but calm, the noise here is astounding. I am so glad we live in a detached house somewhere in the fields, because we would not have any neighbours left if we lived in an apartment. I have not seen a bird around for years.
4. 5 times the emotions
I am a hypersensitive person, which means that I can feel emotions in others. I am usually right when someone is lying to me, when someone is putting on a brave face or when someone is pretending. I also feel what my kids feel and that is a lot! Whenever something happens, I can understand what that is like for them and I feel the same way. The oldest one forgets to do his homework and the teacher writes it in his book: I feel the embarrassment. A grown-up lets them down by ignoring them when they have something exciting to tell: I feel the disappointment. Even when one of them wants a green plate instead of a yellow one, I swear inside, but I understand.
5. 5 times the…
I can go on for a while about everything that we experience 5 times more than others. 5 times the mess, 5 times the sickness, 5 times the hunger, 5 times the demands, 5 times the worry and 5 times the chance one of them will wake up at night. I am still listening to sounds in my sleep so that I can sort the situation early enough and no other children wake up. On top of that there is also 5 times the chance one of them will be a serial killer, a significantly higher percentage than average.
5 times the good stuff
In this environment of moaning mothers, some important joys are forgotten. Sometimes the bad stuff takes over and if chocolate in the cupboard or a glass of wine can fix that, great. But even though raising a child or children is hard, you also get all the good stuff. I just take a moment and think of all the great things I am lucky enough to receive 5 times as well. Love, support, fun, hugs, adoration, appreciation, smiles and also respect from other mothers is only a short list of things that make my days great.
- Let’s raise a glass of wine to all the little demolishers out there -